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12 Steps to True Happiness

Happiness seems to be an elusive and yet desired state for many. People want to be happy as a direct result of being/feeling unhappy... they may feel that something is missing in their lives or that things are going wrong. Remember my old question... if you don't have what you want in your life, why not?


The following are steps to follow which will help you find the happiness you seek:

1. Write down what you are unhappy about. This will help clarify what's important to you and how you describe your personal happiness. Each item on your list needs to be addressed differently than you have previously or else you'll likely keep getting a similar result.

2. Recognize that you have, in some way, contributed to your unhappiness and can therefore do the same to contribute to your happiness! We don't make ourselves unhappy on purpose... so we need to make a conscious effort to contribute to changing that.

3. Make a decision to be happy. You need to allow for room in your mind to believe that you can and will make things different in your life.

4. Develop a daily plan and write it down with a clear objective to achieve your daily goals. It takes time and effort to create a thought change... creating and being committed to a behavioural change is something you can do, sometimes in spite of how you feel... like going to the gym or taking a walk. Create some momentum with your plan. It is true that the more you do something, the easier it gets to do it.

5. Our bodies are chemical factories and are meant to function in a certain way. Be aware of what you are putting into and change what you need to in order to optimize its appropriate operation. For most people minimizing carbs, sugars and fats will help. Talk to a holistic nutritionist and read up on what's recommended for you. What we put into our bodies can directly effect mood, energy, motivation, focus and commitment.

6. As our bodies need to be fed properly, they also need to be exercised. Our bodies are designed to move... this does not mean you need to be a marathon runner... start by going for daily brisk walks, doing some stretching, etc. Do something you enjoy doing... that makes it easier to NOT do it!

7. Check your attitude... Write what where your thoughts typically lead you. Are they positive, negative, neutral???? Work on making your approach more positive first by being aware of the thoughts you are having, then interfering with what is your normal process by consciously focusing on a more beneficial thought.

8. Be grateful. There is always something you can be grateful for. Write them down and refer to them at times when you need to be interfering with an ungrateful or "poor me" time.

9. Develop a support group of friends. People who you can comfortably spend time with and ask for feedback on questions, enjoy activities with and laugh with.



10. Smile more, whistle, skip, laugh... Provide yourself with experiences of happiness.

11. Forgive others and yourself for all the harms that have be done. We are all just walking through our lives trying to do what we think (or have been taught) we should do. The biggest crime we may commit typically is thoughtlessness. Forgiveness stills the heart and quiets the mind.

12. Get help. It is normal that any change is difficult and challenging. Having professional help will speed up your progress and help you look at areas you may be more reluctant to look at yourself as well as providing accountability and support.

Happiness is within your grasp. Reach out to find it.

Until later,

Leland Clipperton
Leland@CounsellingandMediation.com
www.CounsellingandMediation.com
705 999-2107
905 510-9117


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